Mike’s Had Better Weeks

Terry Molloy (Mike Tucker)

Poor Mike - he had the pasteuriser go wrong last week and Vicky is putting the bite on him to move to Birmingham. Just when things can’t get any worse, they do, as Jazzer leaves the milk van unattended for a few moments and it is nicked. Good news: it turns up. Bad news: it’s been burnt out. It seems that Mike thinks that someone is trying to tell him something and he informs Jazzer (who tells Ed) that he is trying to sell the business.

Ed isn’t best pleased that he wasn’t told first hand and even less pleased that he won’t have a market for his milk. He and Jazzer get together in the cider club shed to do some brainstorming about how to make money. Could they buy Mike’s business? What with, lads? Also, Jazz is reluctant to give up his pig work. It looks bleak.

‘Bleak’ is a good word to describe the fortunes of Roy and Hayley; at the beginning of the week, Lizzie has a heart to heart with roy along the lines of “we can’t go on like this.” Roy agrees and says he’ll bite the bullet and leave Hayley for Elizabeth. This, however wasn’t what Liz meant and she tells Roy that he ought to look for a job somewhere else. “You’re sacking me?” he cries, but Liz says that she’d like his leaving to be “by mutual consent.” That sounds better than ‘being tossed aside like a spent match’ but Roy is definitely getting the Big E.

He goes home and is spotted by Hayley looking for jobs on the Internet. In answer to her questioning, he says “It’s time I moved on from Lower Loxley.” Hayley isn’t stupid and later on in the week she confronts Elizabeth about her relationship with Roy and shows her the heart-shaped locket that Liz returned to him. Liz doesn’t deny it and a bitter Hayley says “I thought the world of you - I trusted you.” She also accuses Liz of smashing up their world, adding: “It was a lovely world, Elizabeth.” Liz could have said “Your comments have been noted, now get back to work” but she didn’t.

Hayley returned home and Roy came in to find the children have been farmed out and it’s serious discussion time. On Roy’s part, this consists of phrases such as “I never meant to hurt you” and “I still love you.” Hayley says that she knows she’s nothing compared to Lizzie (well, you are 10 years younger Hayley) and that she’s only with Roy because Kate dumped him and she’s always been second best. She’s really good at laying a guilt trip on her errant husband and I for one say ‘good for you, girl’. She finishes by saying: “The simple matter is that I’m not good enough for you, am I?” and, when an increasingly-distraught Roy asks “Where do we go from here?” her answer is “You tell me Roy, because I’ve got no idea.” I think it will take more than a few flowers to smooth this over, although he does have a heart-shaped locket she can have.

From the dramatic to the farcical - according to Lynda, the latest favourite name for her grandson is ‘Mungo’, which I submit is an improvement on Mowgli or Montezuma. Perhaps you’d like to pick your own stupid name beginning with ‘M’.

Lynda also eeveals to David and Josh that apparently the cost of adopting Route B would be considerably less than for Routes A or C, which doesn’t bode well for any compensation money for Brookfield. “So have we lost already?” asks Josh, who might be thinking that as he’s learning to drive, he’ll have a nice, new dual carriageway to practice on. “We still have the Brown Hairstreak” says Lynda - this is going to be the best looked after butterfly in the world, I reckon.

At Bridge Farm, Johnny (the grandson formerly known as Rich) has been spending a few days getting involved with all aspects of day-to-day farming and enjoying it hugely. He even averted disaster when a speeding Jazzer caused the cattle to stampede (or at least move off quickly) and Johnny persuaded the bull Otto to follow him into a field. Eddie, who was watching, tells Tony “That lad’s a born stockman, isn’t he?”

But all is not well. Pat and Tony hold a family tea at Bridge Farm, with Johnny, Peggy, Rob, Helen and Henry. Pat confides to Peggy how much she has enjoyed having Johnny there but Peggy says that he is supposed to be going home next week to start sixth form college and why doesn’t Pat ring Sharon (his Mum) now to arrange a pick up? Pat does so and, when she tells Johnny that his Mum will pick him up on Sunday, he goes off on one, saying that he doesn’t want to go to college and “I want to stay here and work on the farm, just like my dad.” Could be a long trip back to Yorkshire.

Helen is paranoid that everyone is talking about Jess and her and Rob. She’s probably correct, as Susan tells Clarrie that Jess was pregnant and suggests that Rob could be “Another Brian Aldridge, with babies everywhere.” let’s face it; if Susan knows, then so will everyone within minutes. Actually, Rob exhibits his manipulative side, as he wants Helen and Henry to ride with the hunt and he says what better way to demonstrate that they are a family? Helen is definitely weakening.

Finally, I was going to make up a limerick about the relationship between Roy and Elizabeth, but I had to give it up, as I couldn’t  for the life of me think of a rhyme for ‘Tucker’…